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- A bride getting married next year is upset because her maid-of-honor won’t attend her wedding.
- The bride changed her wedding date to her maid-of-honor’s birthday, but the maid-of-honor had already booked a non-refundable birthday trip she planned around the initial wedding date.
- Now, the bride’s friends and users on Reddit argue that the bride is in the wrong for moving her date and expecting her maid-of-honor to drop her travel plans.
A wedding date change has driven a wedge between a bride and her best friend.
The bride, 22, asked Reddit users in a post on the platform’s “Am I the A——?” forum if she was in the wrong for wanting her best friend, who is also her maid-of-honor, to still attend her wedding even though she changed the date to her birthday.
The bride explained that she and her fiancé, 29, plan to have a “simple” wedding next year. The only thing they really wanted was their wedding date to fall on the third anniversary of their first date, which happens to be the bride’s best friend’s birthday. But because that date wasn’t available at their chosen wedding venue, they selected and announced a later date.
Two weeks ago, the couple received a call from their wedding venue saying that the date they originally wanted was now available. So, the “thrilled” bride and groom moved their wedding date to the one of their dreams.
“We didn’t have any reservations about doing this because everyone who was coming to the wedding is relatively local and hadn’t made any travel accommodations yet,” the bride wrote in her post. “We told our guests about the change and everyone was fine until I got a call from my best friend and maid of honor.”
The maid-of-honor said that the wedding now fell on her birthday, which the bride was already aware of. This was an issue, however, because the maid-of-honor and her boyfriend booked a non-refundable trip that week to celebrate.
“I was shocked as I hadn’t heard of these plans before, but I just told her that I really wanted her to be at my wedding because she is my best friend in the world,” the bride said. “She told me it was unfortunate that the wedding date moved, but that her trip was already paid for and mostly non-refundable.”
She continued, “I was crying at this point, and just said how this is unfair and how upset I am. She said I didn’t have a reason to be this upset because I moved the date without telling anyone and someone was bound to not be able to go anymore. Some words were exchanged then (basically us going back and forth and bringing up old conflicts) and she hung up on me.”
The upset bride doesn’t think she’s the one at fault in this situation — but others disagree.
“Our mutual friends see her point and think that I should ‘get over it,'” the bride wrote. “However, I think it’s unfair that she would drop out of my wedding so easily because of a small change (literally 21 days). AITA?”
Redditors also thought that the bride is the one to blame for knowingly changing her wedding date to her friend’s birthday.
“You’re turning yourself into a victim who can’t get over a situation that you created and possibly have the tools to fix,” one person commented in part. “As soon as you changed the date you risked people not coming and should have made sure key people could make the new date before accepting … You are not the main character in everyone else’s life.”
“You dithered about the date and after telling everyone one date you thoughtlessly changed it without any consideration that your invitees may have made other commitments in the meantime,” another Reddit user commented. “This issue is wholly of your own making.”